Rewriting (or, more accurately, Tartarus)

I knew my Nanowrimo novel wasn’t top notch. Or even good. But, using the Shrunken Manuscript Revisions method, I single-spaced everything, shrunk my writing to a point 6 Times New Roman font, and printed my 50,000 word, originally 150-paged novel in 31 pages.
I looked at it. And then, I have a post-it in my hand, and I slapped a huge REWRITE on the first chapter (which, by the way, has shrunken to less than a page). Then I looked at the rest of the manuscript. And then my inner writer/editor cried.
Inner Writer: “You gotta rewrite this whole thing.”
Me: “!@^*(% WHY?”
Inner Writer: “You are not conveying this theme and story in a satisfying manner.”
Me: “But–I have tolerable scenes, and–and” *gestures frantically*
Inner Writer: “In other words, your story sucks.”
Me: “Shit. You’re right.”
But a WAY better story structure has emerged–tying everything together in a tighter, more connected manner.  I’m actually glad.
I am now neurotically outlining my next one. I’m definitely WAY better on outlines. I still love pantsing (that’s the only way my story gets out on the page) but now I’ve adopted the outlining method on the Excel spreadsheet. I’ll update on how that works out. 
Except…..I have no definable climax. Or the Dark Night of the Soul, the my-character-has-hit-rock-bottom-and-is-pretty-much-about-to-internally-and-physically-die part.
And what good is a story without its final battle?
I’m leaving on vacation Friday–hope I can generate more ideas then.
Meanwhile, onto my chocolate and comfort food…

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